What You Keep by Suzanne Hicks

When you were little you wanted to be a movie star and told your grandma when you visited that you had to use Camay soap because that’s what movie stars used, so she bought you the little bars of the soap, imprinted with the silhouette of a lady you thought looked glamorous just like Judy Garland who starred in your favorite movie and sang “Somewhere Over the Rainbow” so beautifully, you wanted to sound just like her when you sang the song for your grandma who left a house full of years and years of clutter and treasures when she died, and when everyone was rummaging through her things, staking their claim to the tea cups, jewelry, paintings, even the coveted green lamp, you found an old bar of Camay soap hidden in the back of the linen closet among expired medications, old bandages, and musty smelling sheets, that you tucked in your pocket before you went to get some fresh air in the backyard and look at the tulips that you helped your grandma plant in the garden because all you ever wanted from her was already yours.

Artist’s Statement

I’ve been living with multiple sclerosis (MS) for over 20 years. Life with MS is difficult, but writing brings me so much joy. I feel so lucky to do it, and for the opportunities that it gives me to connect with others. This story was inspired, in part, by thoughts of my grandmother who had an amazing ability to make everyone she cared about feel like the most important person on the planet.

Suzanne Hicks is a disabled writer living with multiple sclerosis. Her stories have appeared in Sledgehammer Lit, Spoonie Magazine, The Write-In, and elsewhere. She lives in Las Vegas, Nevada with her husband and their animals. For more information, please visit her website. Find her on Twitter @iamsuzannehicks.